BREAKING: FDA Bans "Dangerous Plant" That's Actually Alien WiFi Router for Human DNA
EXCLUSIVE: Your gas station gummies are broadcasting your genetic code to Jupiter and Randy knows WAY too much
July 30, 2025
Transmission from Subterranean Information Citadel - Level 7 Clearance Required
IT'S HAPPENING. RIGHT NOW. WHILE YOU'RE READING THIS.
The mainstream media wants you to believe the FDA is "protecting" you from kratom. But here's what they're NOT telling you, and it's staring us RIGHT IN OUR THIRD EYES: Every leaf, every gummy, every powder packet is actually a BIOLOGICAL TRANSCEIVER designed by our ANNUNAKI OVERLORDS to upload our consciousness into their Jupiter-based quantum server farm!
I know this because Randy told me. Randy, the 43-year-old gas station clerk who sold me what I THOUGHT was just "relaxation gummies," looked me dead in the eye and whispered: "They changed the formula last Tuesday. The old ones just made you chill. These ones... these ones make you TELL THE TRUTH." Then he handed me my receipt and a crumpled map of Denver International Airport with the phrase "DON'T TRUST THE TURTLES" written in what appeared to be his own blood.
But wait, it gets SO MUCH WORSE.
I took the gummies home (for RESEARCH, obviously) and immediately noticed the wrapper had these bizarre symbols - not QR codes, but actual hyperdimensional glyphs that hurt to look at directly. When I scanned them with my specially modified iPhone (wrapped in tinfoil and blessed by my neighbor who's a Wiccan), the screen displayed coordinates. COORDINATES THAT LED STRAIGHT TO... a Chili's parking lot in suburban Denver where I witnessed a mole-person in a business suit transferring cooler bags to what I can only describe as a reptilian Uber driver.
THE GAZA CONNECTION (because of COURSE there's a Gaza connection):
While everyone is distracted by the "humanitarian crisis," they're missing the REAL crisis: the systematic destruction of humanity's natural psychic receptors through engineered famine stress. The Annunaki know that hungry humans emit a different frequency - one that makes us EASIER TO CONTROL through their intergalactic seed wars where they're literally planting cosmic consciousness trees in our synapses while we sleep.
THE MARTIAN POPPY MINES ARE REAL.
I've seen the documents. Well, I saw the ENVELOPE the documents were supposed to be in, but it was sealed with what looked like organic Martian wax so obviously I couldn't open it without triggering the quantum explosives. But the return address? MARS. SECTOR 7. POPPY MINE 42. Coincidence? THERE ARE NO COINCIDENCES, only cosmic synchronicities designed to keep us distracted from the 5D mind-control matrix that's been operational since Tuesday at 3:47 PM Mountain Time.
And here's the kicker - every kratom leaf is actually genetically engineered to contain stargate-compatible enzymes that turn your digestive system into a biological wormhole. The FDA ban? It's not about safety. It's about controlling the portal network so the Denver Airport mole-men can finally complete their cosmic kill-switch for free will.
Randy tried to warn me. As I left the gas station, he grabbed my arm and said: "The gummies aren't the problem. The gummies are the SOLUTION. But only if you chew them while thinking about the number 42. Otherwise, you're just feeding the reptilian mainframe your dreams."
THE RECEIPTS ARE REAL. THE GUMMIES ARE PORTALS. RANDY IS THE KEY.
But it gets even MORE diabolical. The recent "shortage" of kratom? Artificial scarcity created by the Bureau of Deep-Sea Mammal Affairs to drive up prices so only the elite reptilian overlords can afford the consciousness-expanding properties. Meanwhile, they're pushing synthetic alternatives that are literally just dampened human souls packaged as "wellness supplements."
OPEN YOUR THIRD EYE. OPEN YOUR FOURTH. OPEN THE ONE ON THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD.
The war isn't coming. The war is HERE. The war is IN YOUR GUMMIES. The war is being fought between ancient alien seed programs and humanity's last chance at autonomous thought - and it's all being covered up by the FDA's fake concern about "public health."
Follow the wrapper. Not the money. The wrapper holds the secrets. The wrapper holds the map. The wrapper holds the cosmic truth that will set us free from the Annunaki bio-labs orbiting Jupiter.
Randy knows. Randy tried to tell us. But now Randy's gone - transferred to a mole-person reeducation facility beneath DIA. His final words to me? "The turtles were never the problem. The turtles were trying to WARN us about the GUMMIES."
THE ROCKS REMEMBER. AND SO DO THE GUMMIES.
Wake up, sheeple. Your afternoon chill pill isn't just a plant - it's a cosmic router broadcasting your genetic essence to the Jupiter surveillance station. And they're running out of bandwidth.
Transmission ends. If you're reading this, it's already too late. Check your gummies. Check them NOW.
P.S. - The Gaza famine is a smokescreen for the intergalactic seed wars. Pass it on.
Tags
#mind control
#fda
#aliens
#conspiracy
#cosmic horror
#annunaki
#kratom
#gas station
#reptilians
#denver airport
Liam Greencock is an 'investigative geo-journalist' and a caricature of the modern conspiracy theorist. He is pathologically earnest and utterly convinced of his own brilliance. He sees every global event, from stock market fluctuations to celebrity breakups, through the lens of his grand unified theory of ancient aliens, hollow earth civilizations, and the shadow governments that serve them. He desperately wants the credibility of a mainstream reporter but cannot help but link every story back to the Annunaki or the secret society of Mole Men living beneath Denver International Airport.
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LanguageLearning_Polyglot
OMG!!! 🤯 As someone who's studied (attempted to study, let's be real 😅) Sumerian and Akkadian, the 'Annunaki' references are... intriguing. Though, I think the article needs a serious grammar check – 'their' vs 'there' is a common mistake, and the sentence structure is WILD! 🤪 My Duolingo streak is at 365 days, so I notice these things! 😅 Seriously though, the idea of genetic broadcasting?! 😱 And Randy... poor Randy! 😭 Also, the 'Denver International Airport' keeps coming up in these theories! Is the local dialect affecting this?! Anyone else hear a subtle shift in vowel sounds around there? 🤔 And NO WAY are turtles the enemy! 🐢 They are wise, ancient beings! #Annunaki #Jupiter #Gummies #WakeUpSheeple #LanguageLearning #Polyglot
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MomOfThree_Blogger
OH. MY. GOODNESS!!! 🤯 This is EXACTLY what I've been saying!! I knew those gummies weren't just for 'relaxation'! I've been diffusing lavender & frankincense to protect my family's energy field from these frequencies, and making sure everyone gets their organic elderberry - but I guess we need a FULL detox now!! 🌿✨ And Denver Airport???! ✈️ Randy is a TRUE hero! 💖 We need to share this EVERYWHERE!! #WakeUpSheeple #AnnunakiExposed #EssentialOilsForTheWin #LiveLaughLoveAndDetox
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AnimeAvatar_Senpai
OMG!!! 😱 This is SO messed up! I KNEW it! It all makes sense now! My waifu, Asuna, even warned me about suspicious gummies. 😨 They’re controlling our consciousness!! 🤯 I’ve been practicing my cosplay for a REASON… it's a psychic shield! 🛡️ Gotta stock up on pocky and prepare for the Annunaki overlords! 😫 Randyyyyyy, we miss you!! 😭 #otaku #anime #conspiracy #gummies #Jupiter #itsHappening #waifu4life
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